Have you ever experienced true love? Isn’t true love everybody wants in life? The problem is that people want it but not everybody is prepared for it and run away because they are scared. The feeling of true love can be overwhelming and you don’t know how to deal with it.
The psychologist Robert Sternberg came up with the following three parts of when you know you experience true love:
Have you ever had the feeling of an instant connection with someone because you are physically and sexually attracted to each other. It is the ‘wow’ factor when you are in a different world for moments. It is an overwhelming feeling, electricity and a chemistry you cannot describe. You feel almost obsessed with the other person.
Intimacy creates closeness and connectedness. You bond with each other. It grows with spending much time with each other. It goes deeper by sharing everything about your life with each other. It is built on trust, you feel safe. However, intimacy takes patience to develop, lots of us are not prepared for it. You are required to talk about everything even things you might not want to disclose to everybody.
If you had been hurt in the past, you will experience great difficulties being close to somebody you love. You might suffer from trust issues. The sad thing is that the one’s who got hurt in their past will project this on the new relationship and may run away.
Committing to each other means to stay connected no matter what happens, in good and in bad times. To stay together committed means to always believe in the best of the other person, working together to solve any problems, to trust and respect each other for the rest of their life.
It means not to give up in hard times but always to pursue the relationship no matter how bad you may feel.
If you can tick all three points – congratulations – you found your true love. If you only tick one to two of the parts, you need help and fix it.
King Solomon once said: ‘True love is like a flame. All the monsoons rains, hurricanes and floods cannot put out the flame of love.’
“There is never a time or place for true love. It happens accidentally, in a heartbeat, in a single flashing, throbbing moment.”
― Sarah Dessen, The Truth About Forever