Setting boundaries is important and necessary; it is a life skill.
We all have our own core values; you might not be aware of it but once you think about it and write it down it becomes very clear what the drivers are in your life. Now, life is challenging us with situations where others control or want to control our life. It might be your work place where you get told to do something even though it might be against your core values. I have seen people, especially younger ones who are scared to say something and just agree and do what they are told to do. However, with more experience you become more aware of what is important to you and have more confidence to defend your values. A lesson I learned in life is to set your boundaries from the beginning. This can be done in a nice and diplomatic way. Setting boundaries means to clearly and openly communicate and asserting your personal values and not compromising or even having them violated. What is acceptable for you and where does it stop? Don’t be afraid to stand up for yourself. Live your values. Some people love to control our lives or don’t want to take responsibility for their own life. It is up to you how much others can take over.
Without knowing your core values and setting your boundaries your identity is becoming diffused and defined by others; but hey it is your life.
Healthy relationships are an ‘inter-dependent’ relationship of two independent people. Identify what is important to you and defend your values, adapt if necessary but stay true to yourself.
When you think about your values you probably come up with 10 important things. Write them all down and once finished think about the least important one in your list and cross it off. Keep going until you have 3 core values left. These are the ones driving you. Now take a second and think about how much time you spend on all the 3 core values? Maybe you don’t spend any time or a minimal amount only. Change it and live your values. Set your boundaries and communicate this with the people you deal with in business and private life. Make your core values a priority in everything you deal with; make decisions which are in line with your personal values when you are being presented with life choices or people try to control and confront you. Having healthy values and boundaries is a lifestyle, not a quick fix to a relationship dispute.
Setting your boundaries means staying true to yourself to live your values
In response to The Daily Post’s writing prompt: “Boundaries.”